Offering Help

by Rabbi Jared H. Saks

After Moses encounters the burning bush while tending his father-in-law’s sheep in the wilderness, God selects him to confront Pharaoh to demand the Israelite people’s freedom. Moses, however, does not believe that he is up for the task. Unlike Jonah, whose story we’ll encounter in the Haftarah reading on Yom Kippur afternoon, Moses doesn’t run from the responsibility, but he does resist. He says to God, “Mi anochi ki elech el Par’oh? Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh?” God pledges to be by Moses’s side and still Moses doubts himself and his capacity to motivate the Israelite people. He asks, “V’hen lo ya’aminu li v’lo yishm’u b’koli? What if they do not believe me and do not listen to me?” God endows him with superpowers. Moses turns his staff into a serpent and his skin to snowy scales. Still, Moses questions his ability to speak truth to power and free his people. He protests, “Lo ish d’varim anochi… k’vad peh uch’vad lashon anochi! I have never been a man of words… I am slow of speech and slow of tongue!” Again, God offers divine support, reminding Moses that God possesses the power to endow humanity with speech and hearing. This still isn’t enough for Moses. He demands, “Sh’lach na b’yad tishlach! Make someone else Your agent!” Now, God is growing frustrated, but offers a solution which Moses finally accepts. Aaron, Moses’s brother, will be his spokesperson and together they’ll bring down Pharaoh and liberate the Hebrew nation.  

There’s an old story about a family who lived in a small town in a valley beside a mountain range. They raised sheep, goats, and chickens. Each month, they’d make the long journey up and over the mountain to bring their goods to market, where they could sell meat, milk, and eggs. This monthly trek was vital for the family’s income and if, for some reason, they missed getting there, they would surely struggle.  

One month, as they navigated their cart on the narrow mountain pass, they encountered a boulder which had fallen from high above. It was smack in the middle of the pass with a steep rockface on one side and a jagged cliff on the other. Their only way to the market was, somehow, to move the boulder. One of the sons saw this as a chance to prove how strong he was. He smiled and said, “I am going to move the boulder.” His family smiled. He leaned his shoulder against the giant stone and heaved with all his might, but it wouldn’t budge. He laid on his back and tried kicking it with his feet. Still nothing. Finally, he tried wedging sticks, branches, and smaller stones under its edge hoping to force it down the mountainside. That boulder stayed right where it was. Despondent, he returned to his family waiting beside the cart. “I’m sorry,” he said, “We’re going to miss the market this month. There is no way to move that boulder. I’ve tried everything.” His family asked him if he’d really tried everything. “There’s nothing left for me to try,” he said. “I’ve shoved it, kicked it, and tried to wedge it off the mountain. I’ve tried everything and nothing works.” His family reminded him there was one thing he hadn’t tried. He didn’t ask them for help. Together, the family pressed the boulder with all of their might and sent it down the mountainside. Now, they could journey on to the market.  

Like the son in this story, we sometimes forget to ask for help. Asking for help can be challenging. Consider Moses and God: All of the back and forth between Moses and God could have been avoided if Moses had asked up front for the help he needed. He didn’t doubt God would be by his side, but that wasn’t enough. He didn’t need superpowers. He didn’t need to be reminded that God gave humanity speech. What Moses needed was an ally, an assistant: his brother Aaron. We often think we should be able to do things all on our own and that if we can’t, we are somehow deficient. But asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. It is a sign of strength. It demonstrates that we know our limitations and we know that others have something to offer as well.  

Offering help has its own pitfalls. We don’t always offer the help that’s needed. The back and forth between Moses and God could have been avoided if God had simply said to Moses, “What do you need?” How often do we step in too soon, offer the wrong kind of help, or fail to ask what someone else needs?  

As we approach Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, the season when we start fresh, may we gain the strength to ask for help when we need it and gain the ability offer help that is helpful.

Image via Pixabay.